Fuck that. Fuck Barbie and everything she represents. Fuck the stoopid culture that spawned her, all 1950’s kitchen appliances and housework aprons and sad women on valium whose husbands left home at 8 and got home at 6, fucking secretaries in even sadder motels along the way. Fuck the executives that saw an opportunity to blend their favourite hobbies, making money, mysogyny and porn.
I’ve heard nothing but great things about the Barbie movie and I’ve not questioned it thus far. Today, I am. I have not seen the movie and I have done zero research, it was a complete shock to discover it was being shown in cinemas and people I know are going. So I am spitballing at the risk of being completely wrong in my huge assumptions. I ask the following questions:
Does the movie make her funny, smart n sassy? Is she da boss of the main boy character and is he a bit of a cissy? Is she into doing actiony things and does she drive a very fast and, ironically of course, pink car? Is she a pansexual gamine type or is she smart, sassy AND funny with killer tits n arse? Is she completely trusting and only sees the good in everything? Is she played as a little bit of a pyschopath along with all the innocence. I bet things get done when she’s on the case though. A pyscho in the board room, fizzbang in the bedroom, look at that - every hetero, male executive’s wet dream. More questions needed.
What fucking story are we being fed here? Who is calling whom to ‘laugh it up, fuzzball,’ while they steal what little is left of their integrity? Are we to laugh at how utterly feckless and belittled we have become to allow this into our culture?
Women, we have let ourselves be reduced into a cock-sized porn doll and paid the price. Can we please just stop it now? Just say ‘no’. I don’t care if Barbie gets the Nobel Peace Prize, after all, Nobel was the guy who FUCKING MADE DYNAMITE. I would still utterly refute the rightness of her existence. See? Barbie and Nobel shat out in the same sentence, can you smell the colour of the culture?
Perception is everything. You know when you shuffle in to the theatre after queuing for your coke and popcorn, n you sit there in the dark with all the bright colours coming at you, you know when the cue comes to laugh but you feel ok about it because you know you’re so evolved you can see the ridulosity of it all and laugh at yourself, laughing at yourself….? Perceive, motherfuckers, perceive. ‘Become aware or conscious of’ SOMETHING, will ya?
Western culture is dead. Long live culture.
Chur x
ps I couldn’t keep the swears out of this one, sorry not sorry.
….. apparently every 25 frame has a graphic shot of Ken getting fisted by Action man ……
….. it’s all dumbed down to just plain old dumb ….
Booster anyone?
OMG you are fucking hilarious 😂